Miggy (theemigs) wrote,

This is how its going to be...P2

so I was talking about my mom...when I was younger she also made it apparent that she thought I didnt need my dads help so she refused any child support...well I think this to be the root of all my financial problems. While Im not poor and have gotten alot of things I truly cherrish, not having alot of money has blocked my chances in accomplishing many of the things and events that I have wanted to experience. I would always try to save, but then something would come up and I would have to use what little I had in savings to pay. This scares the shit out of me...all these fears have driven into me that I have to work harder than ever, whilst not even making all that great of money. Trying to improve yourself and having to work just do not go hand-to-hand. Ive tried it before and I wound up flunking some classes and suffering from exhaustion. Not to mention I lost alot of weight. I just really need to admit that I put way too much emphasis on my future and my predicaments...I need to focus on the present and try to take everything bit by bit..theres just so much dwelling in my brain from work, to the fear of diabetes, to the anxiety of my self-image...its just making me crack so much that I tremble when I try to go to sleep. Being in an accident didnt help all that much either.
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